Artist Rating: 82%
Peak Album Score: 23
Average Album Score: 21
Development Score: 10
- They deserve a 10 here just for Anthony getting voice lessons, but there's no arguing that the growth from the debut (heck, even from Mother's Milk) to Californication is remarkable.
Originality Score: 5
- The punk-funk thing was sort of original, but they did it really badly. Frusciante's guitar playing, and their method of treating ballads in their later years warrant some points.
Personal Bias Score: 23
Red Hot Chili Peppers (1984) - 40%
At least it's short, I guess? With a few exceptions, this album is awful. There's no vocal melodies in any of the songs, with Kiedis trying his best (and doing really badly) to sound like a funky black man, and the instrumental parts are only sometimes interesting. Flea's bass playing is practically the only interesting aspect of this album, actually. "Get Up and Jump" smokes (even though Kiedis makes it really hard to enjoy).
- Highlights: "Get Up and Jump"
Freaky Styley (1985) - 60%
I find myself wanting to like almost every song on this album: the grooves are tight, Flea's bass playing is just so funky and dominating, the production is quite good, and Slovak's guitar playing is really very good. Unfortunately, Kiedis hasn't learned how to do anything useful yet, so literally none of the songs amount to anything (or at least, nearly what they could amount to if treated properly). Sometimes, in fact, I'd rather the songs be instrumental than to hear him yell stupid things in his thin voice. It's a good thing he improved.
- Highlights: "Hollywood", "If You Want Me to Stay", "Catholic School Girls Rule"
The Uplift Mofo Party Plan (1987) - 53%
This album is disappointing in that it's much more an improvement on the band's ridiculously sloppy debut than it is an improvement on/follow-up to Freaky Styley, which is what I'd hoped for (perhaps that's what Blood Sugar Sex Magik is). It's quite a bit better than the debut, obviously, but most of the songs are still totally unmemorable bursts of angsty pseudo-funk. The actual grooves are far less attractive than those of its predecessor, but at least Kiedis sounds a little less dumb here.
- Highlights: "Fight Like a Brave"
Mother's Milk (1989) - 68%
After guitarist Hillel Slovak's tragic overdose, now-legendary guitarist John Frusciante stepped in to fill his shoes. The guitar completely dominates this album, both by carrying the songs' energies and by just being mixed way louder than everything else. Most of the songs are still pretty mediocre (and there are two covers, though one is pretty good), but "Subway to Venus" shows a pretty tight mastery of their sort of funk, while "Good Time Boys" and "Knock Me Down" point in the direction of enjoyable hard rock and even balladry.
- Highlights: "Good Time Boys", "Higher Ground", "Subway to Venus", "Knock Me Down"
Although it's way too long (and this would be a recurring problem for the Chili Peppers here-on out), Blood Sugar Sex Magik shows a rather absurd improvement on the band's part. Songs are consistently very good, driven by tight grooves and great guitar parts, while Kiedis' voice finally doesn't detract from the music (sometimes even adding... a little). I find career-making ballad "Under the Bridge" kind of dull, the title track a little too reminiscent of Freaky Styley (cool grooves with nothing else going on), and "Sir Psycho Sexy" to be comically lengthy, but aside from that this album is just one great groove after another.
- Highlights: "If You Have to Ask", "Breaking the Girl", "The Righteous and the Wicked", "Naked in the Rain", "Apache Rose Peacock"
One Hot Minute (1995) - 64%
Frusciante went drug-crazy for a few years and was replaced by Jane Addiction's Dave Navarro, who clearly doesn't like funk very much; it's all gone. Well, the rhythm section still kicks, but the songs definitely aren't very funky. That doesn't mean they're all bad, though. A handful of songs succeed in a totally different way than the band had really been able to do before: "My Friends" as a straightforward driving ballad, "Coffee Shop" as a rather avant-garde heavy metal song, and "Aeroplane" as a light-headed pop tune. Much of the album is fairly generic 90's metal, though (think Pearl Jam without Vedder's voice); I'm glad John came back.
- Highlights: "Aeroplane", "My Friends", "Coffee Shop"
Californication (1999) - 91%
John makes his healthy return, and the band suddenly gets so good at writing unfunky rock tracks and ballads that the funk songs pale in their shadows. The whole list of six highlights off this album completely overshadows every song the band had previously written, and not a single one is funky at all. I suppose the shift in focus can be attributed to John's having 'grown up' (he was just eighteen when making Blood Sugar Sex Magik, after all...) and thus having prepared himself to take over the group's musical vision. But I have to give Anthony credit: his voice not only doesn't suck on every track; but he actually can sing well here, and adds a signature "LAness" to most of the songs. The album is still quite a bit longer than it should be, but that's the only real complaint.
- Highlights: "Parallel Universe", "Scar Tissue", "Otherside", "Californication", "Easily", "Road Trippin'"
By the Way (2002) - 91%
This one almost sounds like a Frusciante solo album with Kiedis on lead vocals. Nearly every track is a melodically- or atmospherically-driven ballad (though some have funky sections that let poor Flea shine). Most of them work very well, though! Still, the album is (typically) way too long, and I could easily tell you which songs I'd cut. Among songs I wouldn't ever cut are "Can't Stop" (perhaps the band's most perfect mission statement ever), and the strangely entertaining ethnic ones towards the end, "Cabron" (with lead mandolin?) and "On Mercury" (ska?). Equally great, from among the more generic, 'alternative' sounding ones, are "This Is the Place", with a great guitar texture throughout, and "Dosed", which just has a great set of hooks. Heck, the only real low points are the inescapably boring "Don't Forget Me", and the inescapably ugly "Warm Tape". Pretty much everything else is really great. This is a very fun, serious, and consistent album, in spite of John totally dominating the soundscape.
- Highlights: "This Is the Place", "Dosed", "Can't Stop", "Midnight", "Cabron", "On Mercury", "Minor Thing"
Stadium Arcadium (2006) - 83%
As with all n-albums (s.t. n>1), Stadium Arcadium is way too long. But this is a double RHCP album, though, which means that it's, well, the length of a triple album. A triple album. That should make it even more surprising that it's consistently good. Most songs have something to offer (usually their choruses, which are almost all excellent; the verses mostly suck, and that's the album's real weakness aside from its length), with some even entering the RHCP hall-of-fame: "Strip My Mind" is one of the band's best ballads ever, while "Readymade" is one of their best rockers. It isn't even close to the 'settling into mediocrity' people made it out to be, but this thing definitely takes sifting through.
- Highlights: "Snow (Hey Oh)", "Stadium Arcadium", "Strip My Mind", "Readymade", "Turn It Again"
I'm with You (2011) - 82%
To start, this album sounds slick as hell. Production is crisp, Flea's bass is all over the fuckin' place, and Chad's drums are tight as ever. New guitarist (yes, new guitarist..) Josh Klinghoffer holds his weight just fine, though I wish his guitar parts were brought out a bit more - it's always a bit hushed. Anyway, the blame on this album not being as good as former RHCP stuff shouldn't go to Klinghoffer, as it inevitably will (since he replaced genius former-RHCP John Frusciante). No, the blame shouldn't even go to Flea, who took up the mantle of songwriting from the former guitarist and does a pretty decent job. The blame should go to John himself, since.. well.. they need him. Heck, it isn't even that they need him playing lead guitar, Josh does a damn good job - they just can't bring the hooks without him. One Hot Minute was a piece of shit, and this is substantially better all around, but there's something missing that I doubt can be filled in without John's return. That said, some songs are pretty solid nonetheless. The opening "Monarchy of Roses" blows the doors away with a sick noise intro, and then flows into a pretty enjoyable bass-led verse part (think "21st Century"); "Look Around" is standard semi-funky/semi-rockin' Chili Peppers fare, but not any worse than it usually is; "The Adventures of Rain Dance Maggie" is kind of a lackluster single, but in context of the album gets along fine with its decent hooks and groovin' bass part; "Even You Brutus?" succeeds in a pretty much unprecedented way, dropping a sick hip-hop groove and actually featuring Anthony semi-rapping over it with some nice chord changes in the chorus. Anyway, this album is just fine, and I can't really say I was expecting much more out of the Chilis at this point in their career, but... ah, whatever.
- Highlights: "Monarchy of Roses", "Look Around", "The Adventures of Rain Dance Maggie", "Even You Brutus?"
I'm with You (2011) - 82%
To start, this album sounds slick as hell. Production is crisp, Flea's bass is all over the fuckin' place, and Chad's drums are tight as ever. New guitarist (yes, new guitarist..) Josh Klinghoffer holds his weight just fine, though I wish his guitar parts were brought out a bit more - it's always a bit hushed. Anyway, the blame on this album not being as good as former RHCP stuff shouldn't go to Klinghoffer, as it inevitably will (since he replaced genius former-RHCP John Frusciante). No, the blame shouldn't even go to Flea, who took up the mantle of songwriting from the former guitarist and does a pretty decent job. The blame should go to John himself, since.. well.. they need him. Heck, it isn't even that they need him playing lead guitar, Josh does a damn good job - they just can't bring the hooks without him. One Hot Minute was a piece of shit, and this is substantially better all around, but there's something missing that I doubt can be filled in without John's return. That said, some songs are pretty solid nonetheless. The opening "Monarchy of Roses" blows the doors away with a sick noise intro, and then flows into a pretty enjoyable bass-led verse part (think "21st Century"); "Look Around" is standard semi-funky/semi-rockin' Chili Peppers fare, but not any worse than it usually is; "The Adventures of Rain Dance Maggie" is kind of a lackluster single, but in context of the album gets along fine with its decent hooks and groovin' bass part; "Even You Brutus?" succeeds in a pretty much unprecedented way, dropping a sick hip-hop groove and actually featuring Anthony semi-rapping over it with some nice chord changes in the chorus. Anyway, this album is just fine, and I can't really say I was expecting much more out of the Chilis at this point in their career, but... ah, whatever.
- Highlights: "Monarchy of Roses", "Look Around", "The Adventures of Rain Dance Maggie", "Even You Brutus?"
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